Thursday, January 15, 2009

If a tree falls in the forest…

“If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does it really make a sound?”

I have this fear of dying alone in my house and not being found for like months. And when someone finally did find my body it would be so decomposed that they would have to use my dental records to identify that it was me and not some girl who happened to end up dead in my house. Then I start to wonder if I did die, would Bailey and Cam get so hungry that they would try to eat my decomposing body? Doing that would probably contaminate and kill them too, even if they didn’t choose to starve to death. So by the time someone broke down the door to my house, they wouldn’t even want to come in to find me because the stench from our 3 decomposing bodies would be so bad.

This really isn’t outside the realm of possibility. Sometimes I can go days without seeing anyone. If I didn’t show up for work without calling in for 2 consecutive days in a row, they just consider that you “quitting without notice” and no one would try to investigate- trust me- we are not very personally connected at my work. In fact, I can go months without anyone actually coming to my house, so this really isn’t that far-fetched.

I once fell and broke my toe (it was major…cracked it completely in half…it was pointing in the wrong direction and everything) and if I wouldn’t have had a boyfriend at the time, I don’t know what I would’ve done. He drove over and took me to the ER at midnight and stayed with me and took care of me in the following weeks as I hobbled around. If something like that (or worse) happened to me while I was at home now, I don’t know what I would do.

Sure I have friends who say they would do anything for me, but half the time when I try to call just to chat, they don’t answer right away. So if I was dying on the kitchen floor, I doubt I would be able to get in touch with one of my top friends before I lost consciousness. And really sometimes I doubt some of my friends would be willing to get out of bed at 2 am on a work night to come help me.

Yet another reason I need to get a maid so that at least she could find my body. Or maybe I need a roommate?

Sometimes I hate living alone.

(Sorry for the morbidity. This has been a horrible week, so my thoughts haven’t been all flowers and sunshine. I'll be back to my normal self soon.)


Steph said... comment. You probably know what I would say anyways.

Brooklyn said...

I agree with Steph, no comment for me either - you know what all of your friends are thinking.

Suz said...

I totally did not mean this as a dig on my friends or their loyalty. I was just thinking how if something happened to me at 2 am one night, home alone, it wouldn't be so easy to get help...especially if I couldn't get to a phone!

Angela said...

My dad calls me daily, so I'm sure that he'd get REALLY worried and someone would try to find me.

Heath said...

You know i love you, but this post made me a little mad, Suz. In fact, so mad, i think I'm actually coming over after work to kill you and see what happens. lol.
Seriously though, with all the friends and support you have around you, you are one fo the last people who would EVER have to worry about this. Try not to worry about negative things and look at all you have. It's alot!!

Abby said...


Don't be so negative!!! Stop worrying what will happen to you! You can't live life like that. You have tons of friends, but if you keep making comments like that your friends will start to wonder if you trust them.