When I was 18...

I look so young! It is hard to remember back then, but here it goes...

The summer before I turned 18 was my last summer before leaving for college. I soaked up every moment with my friends. We all went to senior week at Myrtle Beach together after graduation where I got my eyebrow pierced. (I was trying to be different, but some other girls decided to get one too, so I didn't end up being that different, but I still kind of liked it!) That week is still to this day one of the most fun weeks I have ever had. I met a really hot Canadian there and swam in the ocean with him as the sun came up. I never saw him again though but I still have pictures:



Even all the sadness and pain I went through with Josh dying couldn't kill the boy craziness of my 17 year old self. I had crushes on lots of boys, but some even told me they wouldn't consider dating me because I was Josh's girl. Then I met the long timer. He didn't know I had been Josh's girlfriend and flirted shamelessly with me in pottery class during my last semester. He was the star football player and kind of a bad boy, so yeah he hooked me. He was funny and he was a good friend, but a TERRIBLE boyfriend. I think he was cheating on me the whole 6 or so years we were together, but he was good at hiding it and always had an excuse. And because I was so young and stupid I believed all his excuses and explanations. But I don't think I could've made it through those years without him. He was probably the only one that knew just how messed up I was from Josh's death because I hid it really well once I left for college.

I chose ECU because it was the school furthest away from my hometown without leaving the state. I went down early for sorority rush, so yes, I was 17 when I went to college! Sounds cool now but not so cool when you can't even get into the club and all your friends can!

I joined a sorority. I didn't get my first choice and I was so upset about it, but now I am so thankful! My sorority is where I met most of my lifelong friends that I have today!

I roomed with one of my good friends from high school. We had one of the best dorm locations ever, but it was the most boring dorm ever. It was all upperclassmen and all girls and so quiet. I would have almost given up the air conditioning and rock star location to live in one of the party dorms...nevermind, the air conditioning was totally worth it. When I think of what hell might feel like, I think of Greenville. It was that bad. I don't know how those people without AC made it!

I made the mistake of taking an 8 am class my first semester which I failed because I never went. (I ended up grade replacing it with an A the next semester and I NEVER took an 8 am class again.) We lived in a tiny door room and ate in the dining halls.

I went to parties and themed socials with my sorority. Here is me ready to go to one of our Gangsta socials (notice my tiny dorm room in the background):



I took at statistics class my second semester that I ROCKED while everyone else struggled with it. This made me switch my major from physical therapy to business.

I went home all the time because my boyfriend was back at home.

I went up to UNC for Halloween which is crazy because ECU is known for their Halloween celebrations (I only went downtown once on Halloween and all the drunk crazy people scared me so much I avoided it from then on so it was probably for the best!)

I remember it was hard that first year. Not so much the classes, but I got homesick and felt lonely a lot. It was a big school and I felt so small.

The dorm room got way too small though! By the end of the semester, I think my roommate and I were both glad to get out of there and away from each other. I still love her, but it was hard adjusting to being around someone 24/7 in a tiny room with no where to go.

I really can not remember much else. I always say it was because I was kind of in a haze and had shut down so much of myself for those years after Josh died. I just kind of went through the motions.

That summer I came home and got my one and only waitressing job at a resturant called Blueberry Grill- it was a 50's theme. I hated waitressing, but at least this one lasted more than a month unlike my first job! The summer before my senior year of high school I worked as a cashier at a grocery store. But I kept ringing apples up as cherries and squash as eggplant and just decided one day that it would be much more fun to go to the lake with my friends rather than go in to work, so I had a friend call and quit for me. Dang produce section! I would've been a great cashier if only I didn't have to slow down to look up those stupid numbers! I was pretty good at waitressing for as much as I hated it. I think it is my sweetness and southern accent, because it sure wasn't my tray carrying skills. I learned to stack 3 plates on one arm just to avoid that dang thing. But at least I made enough money that summer to buy myself a desperately needed new laptop.

When I was 18...
I had an eyebrow ring

I lived in a dorm

I failed Biology

I joined a sorority

I spent a lot of Friday and Sundays on the road

I got some parking tickets

I saw my first ever lavaliere ceremony- this is where a frat boy gives a girl his letters on a necklace and then his brothers get him wasted and throw all this nasty stuff on him and scream at him (this is more evidence of how stupid boys can be)

I gained the freshman 15 (and maybe more!)

But I made it through and even came back for more the next year!