Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Girl vs. Woman

I hate being called ma’am. When did I become a ma’am? It makes me feel old.

But you know what? I am old(er). I’ll be 31 in just a few days. Actually IN my thirties! It’s kind of scary, but it’s good too. I’m starting to see myself as more of a woman than a girl. I still have a lot of girl in me, but I think I have also matured into a strong, beautiful woman. I’m not going to try to pretend I know all the answers to life or anything because I don’t, but I’m a lot more of a woman and a lot less of a girl than I was five years ago.

Girls are insecure but may not always recognize it and try to hide it.

Women are less insecure but are much more open about their insecurities.

Girls HAVE to have the attention of boys and will do almost anything to get it.

Women like the attention of a man, but won’t compromise themselves to get it.

Girls want fantasy land where the prince sweeps them off their feet and they live happily ever after.

Women want a good life with a man they love and can build a life with- the good and the bad.

Girls will throw caution to the wind for the sake of a good time.

Women like to have fun, but think about how their actions may affect their future.

Girls will go into debt for the sake of fashion.

Women will forsake fashion to get closer to financial freedom (or at least financial stability).

Girls will talk about you behind your back but never tell it to your face.

Women try not to talk behind your back and have more courage to tell you what they think.

Girls are more about themselves than others.

Women are more about others than themselves.

There is nothing wrong with being a girl. We are all girls before we are women. I sometimes miss that carefree girl I was in my twenties. But I am embracing this new phase of my life. It’s not a bad transition, just different. I am finally learning to embrace being a woman and letting go of some of the girl in me.

I’m also starting to realize this is my life and no one else’s. Their path won't always fit mine and my path won’t fit theirs. We all have to make our own way. Sometimes we are lucky enough to have people going along that same path with us and sometimes we walk alone. You learn a lot when you get lost. Sometimes you run. Sometimes you need to stay still for a while and rest. The days seem to matter so much, but really it is the years that give you the perspective you need. The accumulation of experiences and the passage of time really show you how far you’ve come. And a day is just a day. Problems that seem so huge look so tiny when you see them in the rearview mirror. All you can do is do the best you can, help others, and have fun along the way.

(This post was semi-inspired today by this post about How to Live a Great Love Story. My love life seems so hard and sometimes hopeless and right now pretty much non-existent, but that post made me realize how much I’ve changed over the last few years and that even though it may not be easy, hopefully in the end it will be worth it.  And you know what, even if I never find love again, I've had a love story.  It was short and yes, I think life will be hard alone, but it's ok.  I'm not so afraid anymore.  Either way, life will go on.)


Katie said...

Your comment struck me: "And you know what, even if I never find love again, I've had a love story. It was short and yes, I think life will be hard alone, but it's ok. I'm not so afraid anymore. Either way, life will go on."

I have been struggling with this for a few years now... This just summed it all up. I am lucky to have had the experiences that I have, and they have made me a better person. I have had a love story. Do I want another one? Of course. But, no matter what my future holds, life will go on - and no matter what, it won't be easy. Nothing ever comes easy.

Just wanted to let you know that this kind of hit home.


Ice Queen said...

I'm about to enter my mid 20's and I've been thinking about the time I've been wasting worrying about "girl" problems. I'm realizing now that I'm making that transition and losing the girl and even though it's a long road, I'm looking forward to it.

AmandaRutherford said...

I found your blog whenever I was in search of what to put on my "30 by 30" list. I really enjoyed this entry because you did an AMAZING job mapping out the difference between a girl and women. I don't think there was anything I disagreed with but it showed me I have a longggg way to go by the time I am 30 to be a women. It furthers my goals and expectations to want to be more then I am now.

Bill Lindsay said...


I stumbled across your blog by pure chance, but was intrigued enough to read a couple of posts. As the dad of a two young girls (the oldest 16), I found your "Girl vs. Woman" post honest, thoughtful and insightful – all signs of the wisdom that comes with maturing. Nicely done and good luck to you.

- BIll