Sunday Snippets on Monday

I’m not going to post my sermon notes. It was all about the “hiddenness” of God…how He doesn’t just come down from the sky and tell us “here is the truth and what I want you to do”. If you want to listen to or read the whole sermon, go here.

Really the best line from the sermon this week for me was “Until you’re surrendered, God’s not showing you anything.” 

This is still the hardest thing for me. I like to be in control of my life. But I did want to know where God was at one point in my life. I started to feel like maybe I couldn’t do it on my own. So I went looking for God. I researched other religions because I didn’t want to just believe something because it was all I knew. But after the research I still believed in Jesus. I started trying to find a church. I listened to the sermons and I prayed (not out loud) but I still didn’t really feel full or different that much.

Then I started surrendering and doing things I REALLY didn’t want to do like getting dunked in a tank of water or writing a check for more than $20 to drop in the offering bucket. I wanted to know God and I was finally willing to do things outside my comfort zone because it wasn’t for me this time, it was for Him. I was admitting “Maybe I don’t know it all”, let me try doing it YOUR way.

I stuck it out in a Bible study that made me feel SUPER uncomfortable. I stuck it out volunteering even though I HATED it at one point. I signed up for a mission trip that cost over $3,000 when I couldn’t even afford cable. And all of these things have more than triple paid off. I LOVE my b-study girls! Volunteering and the mission trip both helped the church finally start to feel small. I actually knew people…I was connected…it started feeling like a family (believe me it was at times painful getting to this point).

(Yes, you don’t “earn” your salvation by what you do, but what you do does reflect what’s in your heart. How would everyone truly know what is in your heart without looking at what you do? It’s the easiest way I can illustrate what’s in my heart to you.)

Most importantly though I was finally looking for God because I truly wanted to know HIM and not just what he could do for ME. He fills me with a love and peace I could never find before. It isn’t easy, and I still grip things tightly, and I still ask for things selfishly when I pray sometimes but knowing God and seeing Him everywhere now has been totally worth it.

He still doesn’t make it easy to get to know Him. Have you ever really sat down and read the Bible? Not just the fun parts, but the more boring obscure parts? It can be confusing as crap. I have so many questions every Tuesday for my small group. I want to know what they think a passage means or why it would be that way, or what happened to the dinosaurs…seriously I ask so many questions. And I know we will never have the answers to them all, but I still seek Him. I still read the Bible to find out what I can. That really is the only way to get to know God. Otherwise you are probably just making God in your image instead of the other way around…projecting your feelings, experiences or beliefs into His character and making Him be like you…essentially making yourself god. Only when you give that up…surrender yourself and make Him Lord of your life everyday, truly seek Him to know Him, that’s when He reveals Himself to you.