This week has been stressful. If I could choose a word to describe how I feel at the end of this week it would be: Failure. I don't know if it is because I put too much pressure on myself, or if I am just not trying hard enough, or if I get stressed out too easily, but a lot of times in my life I just want to hit the pause button and take a break from my life until it gets a little bit better/easier.
I was so busy at work this week that I forgot to submit my time sheet on Monday and didn't get it in until Wednesday, which meant I didn't get paid. I am so broke. I finally got my tax refund and paid off the credit card bill my car repairs racked up in January, but today I went to lunch with some friends and my debit card was declined. It was so embarrassing. Sticking to #5 and paying all my bills on my own at 30 should not be this hard. So I feel like a failure financially.
This week was crazy at work with a lot of our products selling out and a lot of new launches getting ready to happen, and that would have been stressful enough, but then I had a conflict with a co-worker that I still don't feel is resolved and is weighing heavily on me. A few weeks ago we had our big end of the quarter/begining of the year meeting and I felt like I was the only one on our team that didn't get any awards. I tried to hold it in and not let it bother me, but it does. The stress along with my distaste for the contracting company I work for and their lack of benefits, vacation time, and lying to me about the amount of my raise has made me question marking off #3- get a job I love. I feel like a failure at work right now.
I still have no prospects in the romance department and I feel old and ugly and past my prime. I feel like a failure as a former "cute" girl who could turn a few heads back in the day, but no one seems to notice now.
I did run my third 5K last weekend but my time was pretty much the same as the other two 5Ks I have ran. Every time I have come in at 37 minutes and xx seconds. I was not feeling good that day and there was a huge hill at the beginning so I kind of gave up early on and walked the hill. It didn't get much better after that. I put #7- Run a 5K on my list because I thought I would feel proud and that I accomplished something, but after 3 of them I have yet to feel proud or accomplished after one. So yeah I feel like a failure physically.
I wish I could take a vacation or something, but I only have 5 paid days off per year (sick + vacation) and I feel like I need to save them for something important. I wish I had someone to just cuddle on the couch with that could tell me it is going to be okay.
As sad as it is, I wish I could have a cigarette, but that's the one thing I haven't failed at yet.
Ok I am going to try to stop complaining because I'm even making myself sick with all this woe is me crap.
What do you do to pick yourself up from a long day/week/year/life?
Maybe a jog with Cam listening to the words and melody of this appropriate song will soothe my soul a little...
Showing posts with label #5- Pay bills. Show all posts
Showing posts with label #5- Pay bills. Show all posts
Sunday, April 17, 2011
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Finally! Paying all my own bills!
This has been years in the making. I have pretty much covered all my own bills since I graduated college, but I always had a little help here and there from my mom. Ok, maybe a little more help than I should have. She paid my car insurance. She would help cover any of my medical expenses. I used her credit card to pay for my gas. She gave me the down payment for my townhouse.
I started getting uncomfortable with all this help and wanting to be fully financially independent at any cost around 25 or 26. I was a grown up. I should be able to afford to take care of myself financially!
But life is way more expensive than I thought. And entry level jobs pay way less than I thought they did. And raises don't go as far as you think they will. And eventually all your friends get married and there is no one left to room with so your bills essentially double! And don't even get me started on taxes.
Last year I lost my job and I took a job where I was basically making what I made 4 or 5 years ago back when I had a roommate. Only now I no longer had a roommate. Things got really tight. I had to get creative. I had to give up things I never thought I could live without...ahem DVR. I had to get my own health insurance and give up health insurance. No more savings. No more 401K. No vacations. No concerts. No fancy dinners out. I had to pinch every penny.
Thank goodness I found another job a few months ago and I am back to making almost what I made before. I still have to buy my own health insurance and I still don't have DVR. But it's ok.
Living like that for a year helped me think about every single purchase. Do I really NEED that? Is that thing worth not ever getting hardwood floors or going on vacation next summer?
At the same time I don't feel super guilty if I splurge when I buy something that has been on my wish list.
But I will return something in an instant now. Sometimes before I would keep a shirt I ended up not really liking just because I felt it wasn't worth $10-$20 to take it back. Not now! If I get something home and think I won't use it, I take it back!
I'm still trying to get used to my new budget. I get paid on a different schedule and I had to add health insurance and gas into the mix, but it has been a few months and so far so good!
I am officially financially independent!
I started getting uncomfortable with all this help and wanting to be fully financially independent at any cost around 25 or 26. I was a grown up. I should be able to afford to take care of myself financially!
But life is way more expensive than I thought. And entry level jobs pay way less than I thought they did. And raises don't go as far as you think they will. And eventually all your friends get married and there is no one left to room with so your bills essentially double! And don't even get me started on taxes.
Last year I lost my job and I took a job where I was basically making what I made 4 or 5 years ago back when I had a roommate. Only now I no longer had a roommate. Things got really tight. I had to get creative. I had to give up things I never thought I could live without...ahem DVR. I had to get my own health insurance and give up health insurance. No more savings. No more 401K. No vacations. No concerts. No fancy dinners out. I had to pinch every penny.
Thank goodness I found another job a few months ago and I am back to making almost what I made before. I still have to buy my own health insurance and I still don't have DVR. But it's ok.
Living like that for a year helped me think about every single purchase. Do I really NEED that? Is that thing worth not ever getting hardwood floors or going on vacation next summer?
At the same time I don't feel super guilty if I splurge when I buy something that has been on my wish list.
But I will return something in an instant now. Sometimes before I would keep a shirt I ended up not really liking just because I felt it wasn't worth $10-$20 to take it back. Not now! If I get something home and think I won't use it, I take it back!
I'm still trying to get used to my new budget. I get paid on a different schedule and I had to add health insurance and gas into the mix, but it has been a few months and so far so good!
I am officially financially independent!
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Finacially Independent
One of the things on my 30 Before 30 list is to pay all my own bills with no help from my mom. I know, I know..I'm spoiled right? I just got in the habit of my mom covering my gas and my car insurance since I was 16 and I've just never been able to cut that cord because I was afraid. I was afraid of failing financially and that was my safety net. But starting July 1st I am going to try! For the first time in my life I will be paying ALL my own bills on a consistent basis.
Money is a really tough thing in your 20s. You aren't making crap and you suddenly have all these bills. It takes a while to learn how it all works and it is so easy to get out of control in your 20s and spend the rest of you life paying it off.
You look around at your friends and feel like you have to keep up with what they have. First it is the cute clothes and designer purses. Then it is the car and the house. Before you know it you end up in over your head thinking what did I do?
Then you have the fun factor to deal with. Your 20s is when you are supposed to be living it up. You have so much freedom so you should enjoy it right? Drinks after work, dinner out with your friends, concerts, movies, and that big game you just HAVE to go to end up draining your bank account.
Then you have the trips. I mean what other time in your life will you have so much freedom to just get up and go? You want to see the world! You take a cruise for Spring Break. You trek across Europe after graduation. I mean this is what happens in the movies to 20 somethings just like you, so why not you??
One other thing that I have not had to deal with yet, but could pop up in your 20s is children. I can't even imagine the drain that puts on your bank account!
Soon you start to realize there are so many boring important things you have to cover as well like insurance- health, car, home! Then you have 401Ks to fund and oil changes and then your dishwasher quits working and suddenly all your "fun" money has gone to boring grown-up stuff.
It is a lot to figure out and it has taken me over 10 years to feel like I finally have some control over my finances. And that took a lot of falling into deep money pits and pulling myself out of them (sometimes with a little help!). I racked up $2000 on a credit card in college. I got laid off and after months of looking had to take a job at a 30% pay cut and figure out how too make ends meet. But all that has taught me so much that I would have never learned without the unexpected and unimaginable actually happening to me!
I'm no financial expert, but I have got some things down now. According to Charles Schwab's Financial Fitness tool I am in pretty good shape with a solid score of 76. So here are some of my financial tips for 20 somethings:
1. Pay off your credit card balance EVERY MONTH! If you are in debt to credit card companies, make a plan and pay them off immediately. Go on a "spending diet". Pay off the one with the highest interest rate first and work your way down. Once you get them paid off only use them for big purchases (to get the points, rewards, or discounts) and then pay it all off when the bill comes. I say only big purchases because they are not easy to forget. If you use them on everyday things like a trip to Target or a dinner out, it can add up quickly and you might not have enough left at the end of the month to pay it off. A big purchase ($100+) is not as easy to forget and you can just keep that set aside and pay off the bill when it comes (or even better, go right home and pay it off online before you forget!) You want to use credit wisely like that so that when you need a loan for something big like a house or car, you will have the credit score that proves you know how to pay your bills on time!
2. Live more simply. This one I learned over the last year. I had to cut out everything I could. I wanted to go on the annual ski trip with all my friends but I knew I couldn't. I was in LOVE with my DVR but eventually I had to give that up too. I didn't buy new clothes. I was down to like 3 pairs of shoes. I skipped dinners out and movie trips with my friends. But, you know what? It's not so bad. Things you think you just HAVE to HAVE, you really don't. I could probably afford DVR and cable now, but I don't need it. I also did a big yard sale this Spring and it amazed me how much I WANTED to part with. I want my closet to be less crazy! I want to have less knick knacks to dust! So before you buy something really think about how much you really need it and if you buy it and have buyer's remorse the next day or even THINK you won't use it as much as you thought, RETURN IT!
3. Enroll in one of those automatic savings plans at your bank. I enrolled in my bank's automatic savings program a few years ago. I takes a dollar out of my checking account and puts it into my savings account automatically every time I use my debit card- which is A LOT! I never have cash! It doesn't build up crazy amounts, but you can rack up a couple hundred in there over the course of 6-12 months and I can not tell you how many times that account has bailed me out when unexpected expenses pop up- like the AC repair I had to have this week! In addition to that I would recommend getting as much as you can in to another savings account like a Money Market account. If it wasn't for my Money Market account, I would have been screwed when I lost my job last year!
4. Set warning thresholds for your checking account. I have a low and high threshold warning set for my checking account. My low threshold is $500 and my high is $1500. I set it for these amounts because I know if I hit that low threshold I am in danger of not being able to cover my mortgage payment if I don't watch my spending (factoring in the amount of my next paycheck) and if I hit the high threshold I know I should look at moving some of it to my money market account before I get the "I've got money" syndrome and blow it on something I don't need. This is a system that took me a while to get right because of the way my bills come and when I get paid, so just play around with the threshold limits until you find what works for you.
5. Ignore the "Joneses". It is so easy to get wrapped up in comparing what you have to what your friends have. You want a big 3 bedroom house with a garage because that is what your best friend got. You want a nice car because that is what you are surrounded by in the parking lot at Target. You want the shoes everyone is wearing. You want the American Dream- a big house, or that killer apartment, with the 2 cars and maybe even a boat! That's the way everyone lives in the movies right? Ignore it. It will drive you crazy and drive you into debt in a heartbeat. Don't buy things you can't afford. Don't think life is a race of who can get the most and best stuff the quickest. It's not. Figure out what you really need and then once you have those things covered start adding some splurges that make YOU happy. Screw what everyone else has...it's NOT a competition. And trust me, I know this is easier said than done, but it is the one rule that can make your life and your dealings with money so much easier!
So what are some financial lessons you've learned in your 20s?
Disclaimer: This post is part of the 20SB Blog Carnival: Friends & Money, sponsored by Charles Schwab. Prizes may be awarded to selected posts. The information and opinions expressed in this post do not reflect the views or opinions of Charles Schwab. Details on the event, eligibility, and a complete list of participating bloggers can be found here.
Money is a really tough thing in your 20s. You aren't making crap and you suddenly have all these bills. It takes a while to learn how it all works and it is so easy to get out of control in your 20s and spend the rest of you life paying it off.
You look around at your friends and feel like you have to keep up with what they have. First it is the cute clothes and designer purses. Then it is the car and the house. Before you know it you end up in over your head thinking what did I do?
Then you have the fun factor to deal with. Your 20s is when you are supposed to be living it up. You have so much freedom so you should enjoy it right? Drinks after work, dinner out with your friends, concerts, movies, and that big game you just HAVE to go to end up draining your bank account.
Then you have the trips. I mean what other time in your life will you have so much freedom to just get up and go? You want to see the world! You take a cruise for Spring Break. You trek across Europe after graduation. I mean this is what happens in the movies to 20 somethings just like you, so why not you??
One other thing that I have not had to deal with yet, but could pop up in your 20s is children. I can't even imagine the drain that puts on your bank account!
Soon you start to realize there are so many boring important things you have to cover as well like insurance- health, car, home! Then you have 401Ks to fund and oil changes and then your dishwasher quits working and suddenly all your "fun" money has gone to boring grown-up stuff.
It is a lot to figure out and it has taken me over 10 years to feel like I finally have some control over my finances. And that took a lot of falling into deep money pits and pulling myself out of them (sometimes with a little help!). I racked up $2000 on a credit card in college. I got laid off and after months of looking had to take a job at a 30% pay cut and figure out how too make ends meet. But all that has taught me so much that I would have never learned without the unexpected and unimaginable actually happening to me!
I'm no financial expert, but I have got some things down now. According to Charles Schwab's Financial Fitness tool I am in pretty good shape with a solid score of 76. So here are some of my financial tips for 20 somethings:
1. Pay off your credit card balance EVERY MONTH! If you are in debt to credit card companies, make a plan and pay them off immediately. Go on a "spending diet". Pay off the one with the highest interest rate first and work your way down. Once you get them paid off only use them for big purchases (to get the points, rewards, or discounts) and then pay it all off when the bill comes. I say only big purchases because they are not easy to forget. If you use them on everyday things like a trip to Target or a dinner out, it can add up quickly and you might not have enough left at the end of the month to pay it off. A big purchase ($100+) is not as easy to forget and you can just keep that set aside and pay off the bill when it comes (or even better, go right home and pay it off online before you forget!) You want to use credit wisely like that so that when you need a loan for something big like a house or car, you will have the credit score that proves you know how to pay your bills on time!
2. Live more simply. This one I learned over the last year. I had to cut out everything I could. I wanted to go on the annual ski trip with all my friends but I knew I couldn't. I was in LOVE with my DVR but eventually I had to give that up too. I didn't buy new clothes. I was down to like 3 pairs of shoes. I skipped dinners out and movie trips with my friends. But, you know what? It's not so bad. Things you think you just HAVE to HAVE, you really don't. I could probably afford DVR and cable now, but I don't need it. I also did a big yard sale this Spring and it amazed me how much I WANTED to part with. I want my closet to be less crazy! I want to have less knick knacks to dust! So before you buy something really think about how much you really need it and if you buy it and have buyer's remorse the next day or even THINK you won't use it as much as you thought, RETURN IT!
3. Enroll in one of those automatic savings plans at your bank. I enrolled in my bank's automatic savings program a few years ago. I takes a dollar out of my checking account and puts it into my savings account automatically every time I use my debit card- which is A LOT! I never have cash! It doesn't build up crazy amounts, but you can rack up a couple hundred in there over the course of 6-12 months and I can not tell you how many times that account has bailed me out when unexpected expenses pop up- like the AC repair I had to have this week! In addition to that I would recommend getting as much as you can in to another savings account like a Money Market account. If it wasn't for my Money Market account, I would have been screwed when I lost my job last year!
4. Set warning thresholds for your checking account. I have a low and high threshold warning set for my checking account. My low threshold is $500 and my high is $1500. I set it for these amounts because I know if I hit that low threshold I am in danger of not being able to cover my mortgage payment if I don't watch my spending (factoring in the amount of my next paycheck) and if I hit the high threshold I know I should look at moving some of it to my money market account before I get the "I've got money" syndrome and blow it on something I don't need. This is a system that took me a while to get right because of the way my bills come and when I get paid, so just play around with the threshold limits until you find what works for you.
5. Ignore the "Joneses". It is so easy to get wrapped up in comparing what you have to what your friends have. You want a big 3 bedroom house with a garage because that is what your best friend got. You want a nice car because that is what you are surrounded by in the parking lot at Target. You want the shoes everyone is wearing. You want the American Dream- a big house, or that killer apartment, with the 2 cars and maybe even a boat! That's the way everyone lives in the movies right? Ignore it. It will drive you crazy and drive you into debt in a heartbeat. Don't buy things you can't afford. Don't think life is a race of who can get the most and best stuff the quickest. It's not. Figure out what you really need and then once you have those things covered start adding some splurges that make YOU happy. Screw what everyone else has...it's NOT a competition. And trust me, I know this is easier said than done, but it is the one rule that can make your life and your dealings with money so much easier!
So what are some financial lessons you've learned in your 20s?
Disclaimer: This post is part of the 20SB Blog Carnival: Friends & Money, sponsored by Charles Schwab. Prizes may be awarded to selected posts. The information and opinions expressed in this post do not reflect the views or opinions of Charles Schwab. Details on the event, eligibility, and a complete list of participating bloggers can be found here.
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Unbelievable
So I told you last week I had to tell you guys about something crazy that happened to me. It took me forever to write this because it was just such a crazy experience. Even now I think it was so much more than this story. I couldn't even fall asleep that night thinking about the craziness of it all. But here's the story...
Our small Bible study group has been meeting at the same apartment complex for over a year- different apartments, but all in the same complex. Last Tuesday was just like any other Tuesday. We were set to meet at 7, but this Tuesday a few girls couldn’t make it for various reasons. We thought about cancelling the meeting, but in the end decided to go ahead and have it since over half of us could make it.
After the meeting we all walked out to our cars and saw a huge yellow car boot on one of the girl’s tires along with a notice from a towing company on her window. We soon discover that ALL of us were unable to go home! Two girl’s cars had been towed and the other 3 of us had a boot on our cars!
Apparently in this apartment complex all the residents have stickers on the front windshields. None of the spaces were marked, but there were apparently spots specifically designated for visitors. Apparently there is a small sign when you come into the complex notifying you are the parking rules, but seriously none of us ever saw that? Somehow all of us managed to “break the rules” on the exact same night? Our group leader thought she had told us all. She felt horrible about the situation.
The tow truck guy said it would be $125 cash for each car that was booted and $250 for each car that was towed. We were all devastated. Some were quickly checking their bank accounts to see if they had enough to get their car back! We were trying to figure out a plan as to how we were going to get cash for the guy when all of our cars were immobile. Three of the girls jumped in the car with our group leader to head to the ATM armed with the debit cards and PIN numbers for the other 2 girls while they waited with her roommate and the tow truck guys.
“Can we at least get a group discount?...I mean we were at Bible study! We really did not know we were doing something wrong!” we asked holding up our Bibles.
“I know…I know the stickers on your cars. I used to go to the Summit. I know JD. I know what ya’ll are about”
Ummm…was this a good thing or a bad thing? We weren’t sure. But we gave him our best puppy dog eyes pleading for at least a price reduction.
“Ok, I’ll give you $25 off. $100 each.”
We were happy but as we stood there in the freezing cold we couldn’t help but wonder why this man no longer went to the Summit and why this had happened tonight and why we seemed to cross paths with him in this way.
So we asked “Why don’t you go to the Summit anymore?”
He told us about how he had gone through a really painful divorce and kind of got into a depression and couldn’t even work for 9 months. He told us how he started dating someone new but they just couldn’t seem to make it to church together on Sundays and how now with his work schedule he couldn’t make it there. We told him about the different service times. He told us how he thought his problems were bigger than anyone at the church could handle.
Luckily our group leader’s roommate is a part of the Celebrate Recovery ministry at the Summit. She started telling him all about it and where and when they met and how it could maybe help him through what was going on in his life. He seemed really interested.
About that time the other girls got back with the money. We started handing over our money wanting to cry because really we are all broke and could not afford this. But somehow it turned into laughter. We joked about how this was the most expensive Bible study ever and how we could come up with a really good slogan for the Summit’s Small Group campaign about it only costing you $100 to join our small group. We joked how we needed to get into the towing business because it seemed so lucrative. I mean this was such an unbelievable situation all we could do is laugh at it.
We even took a picture with the tow truck, car boots, and our Bibles.
News spread to the other girls who didn’t get to come via Facebook that night and we were seriously now all bonded by this unbelievable experience. We talked about how maybe this had happened because God needed us to speak truth into that man’s life. “Well” I joked, “God don’t make it cheap does he?”
Our small Bible study group has been meeting at the same apartment complex for over a year- different apartments, but all in the same complex. Last Tuesday was just like any other Tuesday. We were set to meet at 7, but this Tuesday a few girls couldn’t make it for various reasons. We thought about cancelling the meeting, but in the end decided to go ahead and have it since over half of us could make it.
After the meeting we all walked out to our cars and saw a huge yellow car boot on one of the girl’s tires along with a notice from a towing company on her window. We soon discover that ALL of us were unable to go home! Two girl’s cars had been towed and the other 3 of us had a boot on our cars!
Apparently in this apartment complex all the residents have stickers on the front windshields. None of the spaces were marked, but there were apparently spots specifically designated for visitors. Apparently there is a small sign when you come into the complex notifying you are the parking rules, but seriously none of us ever saw that? Somehow all of us managed to “break the rules” on the exact same night? Our group leader thought she had told us all. She felt horrible about the situation.
The tow truck guy said it would be $125 cash for each car that was booted and $250 for each car that was towed. We were all devastated. Some were quickly checking their bank accounts to see if they had enough to get their car back! We were trying to figure out a plan as to how we were going to get cash for the guy when all of our cars were immobile. Three of the girls jumped in the car with our group leader to head to the ATM armed with the debit cards and PIN numbers for the other 2 girls while they waited with her roommate and the tow truck guys.
“Can we at least get a group discount?...I mean we were at Bible study! We really did not know we were doing something wrong!” we asked holding up our Bibles.
“I know…I know the stickers on your cars. I used to go to the Summit. I know JD. I know what ya’ll are about”
Ummm…was this a good thing or a bad thing? We weren’t sure. But we gave him our best puppy dog eyes pleading for at least a price reduction.
“Ok, I’ll give you $25 off. $100 each.”
We were happy but as we stood there in the freezing cold we couldn’t help but wonder why this man no longer went to the Summit and why this had happened tonight and why we seemed to cross paths with him in this way.
So we asked “Why don’t you go to the Summit anymore?”
He told us about how he had gone through a really painful divorce and kind of got into a depression and couldn’t even work for 9 months. He told us how he started dating someone new but they just couldn’t seem to make it to church together on Sundays and how now with his work schedule he couldn’t make it there. We told him about the different service times. He told us how he thought his problems were bigger than anyone at the church could handle.
Luckily our group leader’s roommate is a part of the Celebrate Recovery ministry at the Summit. She started telling him all about it and where and when they met and how it could maybe help him through what was going on in his life. He seemed really interested.
About that time the other girls got back with the money. We started handing over our money wanting to cry because really we are all broke and could not afford this. But somehow it turned into laughter. We joked about how this was the most expensive Bible study ever and how we could come up with a really good slogan for the Summit’s Small Group campaign about it only costing you $100 to join our small group. We joked how we needed to get into the towing business because it seemed so lucrative. I mean this was such an unbelievable situation all we could do is laugh at it.
We even took a picture with the tow truck, car boots, and our Bibles.
News spread to the other girls who didn’t get to come via Facebook that night and we were seriously now all bonded by this unbelievable experience. We talked about how maybe this had happened because God needed us to speak truth into that man’s life. “Well” I joked, “God don’t make it cheap does he?”
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Money Money Money
It is my biggest worry every single day. (Well, that and food choices/excise time battle for top place sometimes). I love money and I hate it. It has almost become a dirty word though. It is the root of all evil. I wish it would just go away sometimes, but it is like air, water or food- you need it to survive. And people can be so judgemental about it sometimes! A wise Jewish woman once told me "Don't look in other people's pockets"- meaning don't be concerned about other people's money situation, just focus on your own. I think that is good advice.
But I just got an annoymous comment on my last post and I felt I should address it. This person expressed that I was materialistic and frivilous with my money and that is why they would not be contributing to my mission trip fund.
Dear Anonymous-I'm sorry if you feel I am materialistic in my posts. The reason for this is probably because I don't get to shop anymore, so I have to dream. I will address your specific concerns though:
a) my dog- I spent $46 on a photo shoot for my dog. This also included shooting my mom's dog which will be part of her mother's day and maybe even birthday presents. In my opinion it is better than blowing $30 on something she may never use.
b) yes I want to remodel my kitchen but I have had to modify my plans. Instead of getting new appliances and hardwood floors, I bought about $20 in accessories and some knobs and drawer pulls for about $20. I want to get a new faucet for the sink and new light fixture, but have not found a good deal on those yet. But I estimate this will be less than most people spend on their monthly cable bills.
c) I have not been on an online dating site in a year. That was pre-layoff and I would never spend money on that now.
d) As far as what would happen to the money people donate should I not raise enough- this money goes directly to the church. The checks are made out to "The Summit Church" and online donations are sent directly to the church. None of this money goes to me personally. Should I be unable to raise enough funds to go, this money will be used to fund other people on mission trips through the church. They have a scholarship you can apply for as soon as you cover the cost of your airfare (in my case that is $2000). If I were unable to go or didn't raise enough funds, the money I raised would be put into that fund.
Mr. or Miss Anonymous, I am sorry you find such faults with me as a person and feel that I am materialistic and frivolous. I may post about what I am lusting after or good deals I get when I go shopping every so often- I spent about $50 this month trying to get more organized and make my house feel more homey, but I can asure you 80-90% of my money goes to just living and bills. I do not feel frivolous when I have no home interenet and approximately 3 channels on my TV. I do not feel frivolous wearing the same 3 pairs of pants and 2 pairs of jeans each week (not even enough for a whole week!). I do not feel frivolous when I am driving and scared to death of getting in an accident because I do not have health insurance right now. I do not feel frivolous rotating the same 2 pairs of shoes (one black, one brown) each week. I do not feel frivolous when I am freezing in my house because I have to keep the thermostat on 66. I do not feel frivolous when I get down to less than $10 in my checking account each month, but still manage to not carry a balance on my credit card.
If you would like to give me some finacial advice, I invite you to email me. I am always looking for where I can cut more from my budget. But please keep in mind that you only see a snippet of my life on this blog. And since I spend money so infrequently on anything out of the ordinary, I want to share it. It is a HUGE deal.
I do realize a lot of things on this list require money to do. I will admit I did not think much about that when I made the list and had no idea I would be laid off in the middle of trying to complete it.
It may seem strange to try to go on a mission trip when money is so tight for me, but God has lead me to this mission trip at this time and I am trusting Him to provide for me through people who are able and willing to contribute.
I appreciate your comment and respect your decision to not contribute. However I would appreciate if you have concerns with me to not just annonymously jab at me. If you care enough about me to continue to read my blog, you should know I would welcome an email from you with constructive criticism and love to discuss how you think I could do better. I however do not appreciate jabs at me made annoymously.
I am thankful for what I have and I hate even having to write a post to try to defend myself. Could I cut more from my budget? Sure, but I am doing the best I can to try to adjust my lifestyle to my new salary. And I think I have done a pretty good job so far. I don't write about the sacrifices I make like missing out on the annual ski trip with my best friends or not being able to make a trip to Charlotte to celebrate my old roommate's 30th birthday.
Because I know I have it good. I am not sleeping in a tent everynight. I do not have to ride the bus to and from work everyday. I have food in my cabinents. I have indoor plumbing. But that doesn't mean I haven't had to go without a lot of things I had become used to and with each one I see go, I am mourning the loss, and it take some getting used to.
You should know your comment really did effect me though. I am very hurt by your words and I am constantly beating myself up over how I could do better in life, be a better person, and help others more. I hate asking for help in anything. I mean hate it! This fundraising thing was the biggest hurdle for me to accept when deciding to go on this trip because I did not want to ask for help. And that one little comment just reinforced all of that. I never cry and just that one little comment brought tears to my eyes.
So yeah...I couldn't just respond with a comment back, it required a whole post. That's all I have to say.
But I just got an annoymous comment on my last post and I felt I should address it. This person expressed that I was materialistic and frivilous with my money and that is why they would not be contributing to my mission trip fund.
Dear Anonymous-I'm sorry if you feel I am materialistic in my posts. The reason for this is probably because I don't get to shop anymore, so I have to dream. I will address your specific concerns though:
a) my dog- I spent $46 on a photo shoot for my dog. This also included shooting my mom's dog which will be part of her mother's day and maybe even birthday presents. In my opinion it is better than blowing $30 on something she may never use.
b) yes I want to remodel my kitchen but I have had to modify my plans. Instead of getting new appliances and hardwood floors, I bought about $20 in accessories and some knobs and drawer pulls for about $20. I want to get a new faucet for the sink and new light fixture, but have not found a good deal on those yet. But I estimate this will be less than most people spend on their monthly cable bills.
c) I have not been on an online dating site in a year. That was pre-layoff and I would never spend money on that now.
d) As far as what would happen to the money people donate should I not raise enough- this money goes directly to the church. The checks are made out to "The Summit Church" and online donations are sent directly to the church. None of this money goes to me personally. Should I be unable to raise enough funds to go, this money will be used to fund other people on mission trips through the church. They have a scholarship you can apply for as soon as you cover the cost of your airfare (in my case that is $2000). If I were unable to go or didn't raise enough funds, the money I raised would be put into that fund.
Mr. or Miss Anonymous, I am sorry you find such faults with me as a person and feel that I am materialistic and frivolous. I may post about what I am lusting after or good deals I get when I go shopping every so often- I spent about $50 this month trying to get more organized and make my house feel more homey, but I can asure you 80-90% of my money goes to just living and bills. I do not feel frivolous when I have no home interenet and approximately 3 channels on my TV. I do not feel frivolous wearing the same 3 pairs of pants and 2 pairs of jeans each week (not even enough for a whole week!). I do not feel frivolous when I am driving and scared to death of getting in an accident because I do not have health insurance right now. I do not feel frivolous rotating the same 2 pairs of shoes (one black, one brown) each week. I do not feel frivolous when I am freezing in my house because I have to keep the thermostat on 66. I do not feel frivolous when I get down to less than $10 in my checking account each month, but still manage to not carry a balance on my credit card.
If you would like to give me some finacial advice, I invite you to email me. I am always looking for where I can cut more from my budget. But please keep in mind that you only see a snippet of my life on this blog. And since I spend money so infrequently on anything out of the ordinary, I want to share it. It is a HUGE deal.
I do realize a lot of things on this list require money to do. I will admit I did not think much about that when I made the list and had no idea I would be laid off in the middle of trying to complete it.
It may seem strange to try to go on a mission trip when money is so tight for me, but God has lead me to this mission trip at this time and I am trusting Him to provide for me through people who are able and willing to contribute.
I appreciate your comment and respect your decision to not contribute. However I would appreciate if you have concerns with me to not just annonymously jab at me. If you care enough about me to continue to read my blog, you should know I would welcome an email from you with constructive criticism and love to discuss how you think I could do better. I however do not appreciate jabs at me made annoymously.
I am thankful for what I have and I hate even having to write a post to try to defend myself. Could I cut more from my budget? Sure, but I am doing the best I can to try to adjust my lifestyle to my new salary. And I think I have done a pretty good job so far. I don't write about the sacrifices I make like missing out on the annual ski trip with my best friends or not being able to make a trip to Charlotte to celebrate my old roommate's 30th birthday.
Because I know I have it good. I am not sleeping in a tent everynight. I do not have to ride the bus to and from work everyday. I have food in my cabinents. I have indoor plumbing. But that doesn't mean I haven't had to go without a lot of things I had become used to and with each one I see go, I am mourning the loss, and it take some getting used to.
You should know your comment really did effect me though. I am very hurt by your words and I am constantly beating myself up over how I could do better in life, be a better person, and help others more. I hate asking for help in anything. I mean hate it! This fundraising thing was the biggest hurdle for me to accept when deciding to go on this trip because I did not want to ask for help. And that one little comment just reinforced all of that. I never cry and just that one little comment brought tears to my eyes.
So yeah...I couldn't just respond with a comment back, it required a whole post. That's all I have to say.
Monday, January 4, 2010
Thank you Uncle Sam!
I just found out that the government extended paying for 65% of my COBRA coverage through the end of July! I am so freaking excited!
I had spent the lst month and a half applying for individual coverage because my COBRA was about to go up to over $500 at the end of January. It was a very nerve-wrecking process that included divuldging my complete medical history and an interview with them where they knew every doctor I had ever visited and every prescription I had ever had and I had to explain every one.
This morning I got the approval for individual coverage in my email and signed up for it even though it was the worst possible coverage with ridiculously high co-pays and deductibles and I would be paying $225/mo. instead of $190/mo. (I was happy with that because I expected A LOT worse from what I had heard.)
But when I called to cancel my COBRA coverage they asked why I was canceling and I explained I could not afford over $500/mo. They told me the government had extended that extra coverage and it would cover me under the lower rate until the end of JULY!!
I quickly called BCBS and asked them to cancel my individual coverage (they had no problem with that since my group COBRA policy is through them too so they are getting paid one way or another!)
I have a few more months of good health care coverage and less worry! Thank you God! and Uncle Sam!
P.S. My last post on being Single was just for laughs, so no rude comments please. KTHXBYE!
I had spent the lst month and a half applying for individual coverage because my COBRA was about to go up to over $500 at the end of January. It was a very nerve-wrecking process that included divuldging my complete medical history and an interview with them where they knew every doctor I had ever visited and every prescription I had ever had and I had to explain every one.
This morning I got the approval for individual coverage in my email and signed up for it even though it was the worst possible coverage with ridiculously high co-pays and deductibles and I would be paying $225/mo. instead of $190/mo. (I was happy with that because I expected A LOT worse from what I had heard.)
But when I called to cancel my COBRA coverage they asked why I was canceling and I explained I could not afford over $500/mo. They told me the government had extended that extra coverage and it would cover me under the lower rate until the end of JULY!!
I quickly called BCBS and asked them to cancel my individual coverage (they had no problem with that since my group COBRA policy is through them too so they are getting paid one way or another!)
I have a few more months of good health care coverage and less worry! Thank you God! and Uncle Sam!
P.S. My last post on being Single was just for laughs, so no rude comments please. KTHXBYE!
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Just call me a sucker
I had every intention of cancelling my cable and internet service today. I know, I know…I’m crazy huh? Well, the TV thing just got out of control. I sat down to catch up with my DVR last week and I had 14 hours of recorded TV to watch! 14 hours in 1 week! It was just insane. So I was going to go cold turkey in the hopes of breaking my TV addiction and doing something more productive with my time.
Plus I would save $120 a month! I rarely use my internet service from home so I was pretty sure I could live without it. $120 a month is a lot. All that extra money and free time would totally be worth it. I lived without TV and internet one summer in college and it was the most productive summer of my life! With all that free time I could concentrate on getting some things on my list accomplished like getting in the best shape of my life, reading the Bible all the way through and taking Cam to an agility class. With all the money I would be saving maybe I would be able to save up so I can travel abroad, upgrade a room in my house, pay all my own bills and invest in the stock market. It just made so much sense. I NEED to get crackin’ on this list because I only have less than a year left to get everything done!
Anyway, I called the cable company and of course I get a computer. I tell the computer I want to cancel my service. Twice, the computer transfers me to nowhere land. No hold music, no ringing, just dead silence is on the other end of the line. The third time I call back I decide to call the “sales” number thinking they would be less likely to lose a call to that number.
I finally get through to a person and I tell her I want to cancel my service for financial reasons. She asks which services I want to cancel and I tell her everything.
We spend the next half hour going down, down, down with the price. She is very persistent and despite me telling her at least 10 times I just want to cancel, she is not going to let me go.
First, she can get me all my services for $105/mo then she goes down to $100/mo then down to $95/mo. Now if I downgrade my internet, I can get everything for $89/mo and if I downgrade my cable I can get it for $85/mo. Now if I give up DVR and downgrade the internet some more, I can get it for $45/mo. Finally I just ask her what is the lowest I can go. She comes up with just the broadcast stations and “light” roadrunner for $28/mo. Keep in mind I started out at $120/mo.
I still want to just turn everything off for a while. But she tells me if I decide to turn it back on I will have to pay an instillation fee. I figure the $28/month isn’t that much to pay for keeping up with my TODAY show routine in the morning and catching some of the cable shows I like every once in a while and having internet to keep my I-pod up-to-date and for emergencies. So I agree to it.
I am a sucker. I cannot believe I gave in when I had my heart set on cancelling! But it is a really great deal right? Or do you think I should call back and try to cancel again?
P.S. Update on the mouth situation: It isn’t hurting anywhere near as bad today. I called my dentist yesterday to double check for cavities and he said he didn’t see anything. I cancelled my orthodontist consultation because I don’t think that is going to solve my pain issue. I called my doctor back and told her it didn’t hurt nearly as bad as it did this weekend. She wants me to start the Tegratrol, but I am holding off until it hurts again. They also made me a neurologist appointment but it isn’t until Nov. 3rd! So it is all good for now, but I will keep you updated.
Plus I would save $120 a month! I rarely use my internet service from home so I was pretty sure I could live without it. $120 a month is a lot. All that extra money and free time would totally be worth it. I lived without TV and internet one summer in college and it was the most productive summer of my life! With all that free time I could concentrate on getting some things on my list accomplished like getting in the best shape of my life, reading the Bible all the way through and taking Cam to an agility class. With all the money I would be saving maybe I would be able to save up so I can travel abroad, upgrade a room in my house, pay all my own bills and invest in the stock market. It just made so much sense. I NEED to get crackin’ on this list because I only have less than a year left to get everything done!
Anyway, I called the cable company and of course I get a computer. I tell the computer I want to cancel my service. Twice, the computer transfers me to nowhere land. No hold music, no ringing, just dead silence is on the other end of the line. The third time I call back I decide to call the “sales” number thinking they would be less likely to lose a call to that number.
I finally get through to a person and I tell her I want to cancel my service for financial reasons. She asks which services I want to cancel and I tell her everything.
We spend the next half hour going down, down, down with the price. She is very persistent and despite me telling her at least 10 times I just want to cancel, she is not going to let me go.
First, she can get me all my services for $105/mo then she goes down to $100/mo then down to $95/mo. Now if I downgrade my internet, I can get everything for $89/mo and if I downgrade my cable I can get it for $85/mo. Now if I give up DVR and downgrade the internet some more, I can get it for $45/mo. Finally I just ask her what is the lowest I can go. She comes up with just the broadcast stations and “light” roadrunner for $28/mo. Keep in mind I started out at $120/mo.
I still want to just turn everything off for a while. But she tells me if I decide to turn it back on I will have to pay an instillation fee. I figure the $28/month isn’t that much to pay for keeping up with my TODAY show routine in the morning and catching some of the cable shows I like every once in a while and having internet to keep my I-pod up-to-date and for emergencies. So I agree to it.
I am a sucker. I cannot believe I gave in when I had my heart set on cancelling! But it is a really great deal right? Or do you think I should call back and try to cancel again?
P.S. Update on the mouth situation: It isn’t hurting anywhere near as bad today. I called my dentist yesterday to double check for cavities and he said he didn’t see anything. I cancelled my orthodontist consultation because I don’t think that is going to solve my pain issue. I called my doctor back and told her it didn’t hurt nearly as bad as it did this weekend. She wants me to start the Tegratrol, but I am holding off until it hurts again. They also made me a neurologist appointment but it isn’t until Nov. 3rd! So it is all good for now, but I will keep you updated.
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
I can always find ways to waste time!
Last week when I was so broke, my mind starting getting pretty extreme with my money saving ideas. I had pretty much decided I was going to cut off my internet AND cable! I needed a reason to stop wasting time in front of the TV and computer anyway.
But then I got a check from my mom for $149 to pay me back for the money I spent on that speeding ticket. She was sneaky and sent it during the week she was out in Seattle so I couldn’t even call her and tell her it was too much. (My mom is technically challenged and doesn’t own a cell phone. So every time she goes out of town, I pretty much have no way to get in touch with her. Hmmm maybe she does that on purpose?) Anyway, after a few days carrying the check around, I finally gave in and deposited it. Now I don’t feel so desperate and I’m having second thoughts about living without TV.
I have tried not watching TV much over the past few days. I was hoping this would lead me to extreme boredom which would force me to exercise, but unfortunately I am an expert at wasting time.
First it was Mah Jong online. Then I discover this game called Sushi Chef. Now I am obsessed! I played the free trial version a couple times and then I decided to upgrade to the full version. Since I had extra money in my pay pal account from my ebay obsession days, I feel like I didn’t even have to pay for it!
Go check out the trial version here: http://www.miniclip.com/games/youda-sushi-chef/en/
It is insane when you get to the higher levels, and it stresses me out, but I could seriously waste a couple hours playing this game!
When I get tired of playing that game, I have books to keep me company. I’ve read quite a few this month. Go check out my reviews on my Bookshelf Blog.
When all else fails I turn to my cell phone and call people and have random conversations about really nothing at all.
So TV or no TV, Internet or no Internet, I still find plenty of ways to waste my time!
But then I got a check from my mom for $149 to pay me back for the money I spent on that speeding ticket. She was sneaky and sent it during the week she was out in Seattle so I couldn’t even call her and tell her it was too much. (My mom is technically challenged and doesn’t own a cell phone. So every time she goes out of town, I pretty much have no way to get in touch with her. Hmmm maybe she does that on purpose?) Anyway, after a few days carrying the check around, I finally gave in and deposited it. Now I don’t feel so desperate and I’m having second thoughts about living without TV.
I have tried not watching TV much over the past few days. I was hoping this would lead me to extreme boredom which would force me to exercise, but unfortunately I am an expert at wasting time.
First it was Mah Jong online. Then I discover this game called Sushi Chef. Now I am obsessed! I played the free trial version a couple times and then I decided to upgrade to the full version. Since I had extra money in my pay pal account from my ebay obsession days, I feel like I didn’t even have to pay for it!
Go check out the trial version here: http://www.miniclip.com/games/youda-sushi-chef/en/
It is insane when you get to the higher levels, and it stresses me out, but I could seriously waste a couple hours playing this game!
When I get tired of playing that game, I have books to keep me company. I’ve read quite a few this month. Go check out my reviews on my Bookshelf Blog.
When all else fails I turn to my cell phone and call people and have random conversations about really nothing at all.
So TV or no TV, Internet or no Internet, I still find plenty of ways to waste my time!
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Why I failed at envelope budgeting
For the month of September I was going to try the envelope budgeting method. This is where you take cash and put it in envelopes for your various expenses and once it is gone, it’s gone. I am still getting used to my take home pay amount and don’t have an official “budget” to go by, but I figured I would just pay all my bills online and then take the rest out in cash and split it up amongst the envelopes.
I deposited what I thought would cover my bills and took the rest out in cash.
First I had to get a certified check to pay my speeding ticket.
Then I sat down and paid my bills- mortgage, HOA dues, electric, gas, water/trash, cable/internet, and cell phone.
Then I took some of the cash I took out and deposited it in my Money Market account to pay my car payment. (I hadn’t done this since I bought the car back in April. It was just draining that account down to nothing!)
Then I got 2 other bills I wouldn’t get normally. One was my AMEX bill for the J Crew dresses I bought for church and the other was one from my Limited card for some jeans I had bought because I was seriously down to just one poor pair of jeans. At the time I bought these I didn’t really have enough money to cover them in checking, so I figured I’d just charge it and pay it off with next month’s paycheck.
I NEVER carry credit card debt because back in college I got a lesson in how quickly that interest can make it get out of control and you really start to feel like you are never going to pay it off.
Then I remembered I had to write a check for my health insurance.
So I added up the amount for the health insurance and 2 credit card bills. I went to my cash stash and started counting it out so I could deposit that back into my checking to cover these bills. When I got done, I had one $20 bill left! I looked in my wallet because I knew I had put a $20 in there when I first got cash out. There was a $10 bill and some change.
I decided I didn’t want to split up the two poor little bills I had left so I just stuck the $20 in my wallet.
I have $9 left of that now.
I don’t get paid again for 3 weeks.
So much for envelope budgeting!
Something is going to have to change in October...I am thinking about cutting off Time Warner, (they've been bleeding me dry forever anyway) going with Dish Network or something and living without internet at home. Any other suggestions?
I deposited what I thought would cover my bills and took the rest out in cash.
First I had to get a certified check to pay my speeding ticket.
Then I sat down and paid my bills- mortgage, HOA dues, electric, gas, water/trash, cable/internet, and cell phone.
Then I took some of the cash I took out and deposited it in my Money Market account to pay my car payment. (I hadn’t done this since I bought the car back in April. It was just draining that account down to nothing!)
Then I got 2 other bills I wouldn’t get normally. One was my AMEX bill for the J Crew dresses I bought for church and the other was one from my Limited card for some jeans I had bought because I was seriously down to just one poor pair of jeans. At the time I bought these I didn’t really have enough money to cover them in checking, so I figured I’d just charge it and pay it off with next month’s paycheck.
I NEVER carry credit card debt because back in college I got a lesson in how quickly that interest can make it get out of control and you really start to feel like you are never going to pay it off.
Then I remembered I had to write a check for my health insurance.
So I added up the amount for the health insurance and 2 credit card bills. I went to my cash stash and started counting it out so I could deposit that back into my checking to cover these bills. When I got done, I had one $20 bill left! I looked in my wallet because I knew I had put a $20 in there when I first got cash out. There was a $10 bill and some change.
I decided I didn’t want to split up the two poor little bills I had left so I just stuck the $20 in my wallet.
I have $9 left of that now.
I don’t get paid again for 3 weeks.
So much for envelope budgeting!
Something is going to have to change in October...I am thinking about cutting off Time Warner, (they've been bleeding me dry forever anyway) going with Dish Network or something and living without internet at home. Any other suggestions?
Monday, May 25, 2009
The Long Lonely Search
It has been almost four weeks since I lost my job. In those four weeks I have applied to over 30 jobs. I have searched almost every day for any marketing positions in my area. I have applied to every one I have found.
I had an interview the week before I got laid off, but I lost out on that job to someone with more experience. I got great feedback from the interview and they want to keep me on file for future openings. The HR person said it was just a very competitive job market right now.
The only other call back I got was for a part-time marketing coordinator for a local Realtor. I applied to a few real estate positions because back in 2005 I got my NC Real Estate salesperson license. Last year I took the broker update course to update my license to broker status. I never did anything with it because being an employee is very secure with benefits and a steady paycheck and everything. Plus it costs a lot to start a real estate career with all those association fees and the continuing education classes that are required to take my license off inactive status. I thought this marketing coordinator position would be the perfect way to dip my toes in the water, but I just don't think I can live off $300 a week. I get more than that from my unemployment benefits. Plus I would have to spend $500-$1000 just to get my license on active status for the position.
Speaking of unemployment benefits...I find all that very confusing. I was able to apply for it over the phone. I tried to do it online, but their website just kept taking me in circles. But over the phone is still better than having to go stand in the unemployment line. The only feedback I got from that application was one letter in the mail telling me how much I would get per week and another giving me the option to have taxes deducted automatically and have it direct deposited to my checking account. I am going to opt for the direct deposit, but not the tax deduction. I'll take my chances paying those when they are due when I hopefully have a job.
The confusing part is I am not completely sure how this all works. It seems I have to submit a weekly certification for unemployment. I really feel like I have no clue what I am doing right now so I will be happy once I see that first check from them.
On another note, I feel somewhat guilty collecting money from the government. I pride myself on trying to be self-sufficient and I was so close to being able to pay all my bills with no help from mom. But now I am back to using her credit card to pay for gas and it is highly unlikely I will be able to take over my car insurance payments in June as planned. Now I am also accepting help from the government and that is just sad. I am trying to look at it like I am just getting back some of that money I paid in taxes all those years.
It really sucks not hearing anything week after week. But I will keep applying and I am going to look into the real estate options as well. Hopefully the right door will open for me soon!
I had an interview the week before I got laid off, but I lost out on that job to someone with more experience. I got great feedback from the interview and they want to keep me on file for future openings. The HR person said it was just a very competitive job market right now.
The only other call back I got was for a part-time marketing coordinator for a local Realtor. I applied to a few real estate positions because back in 2005 I got my NC Real Estate salesperson license. Last year I took the broker update course to update my license to broker status. I never did anything with it because being an employee is very secure with benefits and a steady paycheck and everything. Plus it costs a lot to start a real estate career with all those association fees and the continuing education classes that are required to take my license off inactive status. I thought this marketing coordinator position would be the perfect way to dip my toes in the water, but I just don't think I can live off $300 a week. I get more than that from my unemployment benefits. Plus I would have to spend $500-$1000 just to get my license on active status for the position.
Speaking of unemployment benefits...I find all that very confusing. I was able to apply for it over the phone. I tried to do it online, but their website just kept taking me in circles. But over the phone is still better than having to go stand in the unemployment line. The only feedback I got from that application was one letter in the mail telling me how much I would get per week and another giving me the option to have taxes deducted automatically and have it direct deposited to my checking account. I am going to opt for the direct deposit, but not the tax deduction. I'll take my chances paying those when they are due when I hopefully have a job.
The confusing part is I am not completely sure how this all works. It seems I have to submit a weekly certification for unemployment. I really feel like I have no clue what I am doing right now so I will be happy once I see that first check from them.
On another note, I feel somewhat guilty collecting money from the government. I pride myself on trying to be self-sufficient and I was so close to being able to pay all my bills with no help from mom. But now I am back to using her credit card to pay for gas and it is highly unlikely I will be able to take over my car insurance payments in June as planned. Now I am also accepting help from the government and that is just sad. I am trying to look at it like I am just getting back some of that money I paid in taxes all those years.
It really sucks not hearing anything week after week. But I will keep applying and I am going to look into the real estate options as well. Hopefully the right door will open for me soon!
Friday, January 9, 2009
Goodbye Magic Card…I’ll miss you!
The one good thing in this economy is the price of gas won’t cost you an arm and a leg anymore. I mean, it is under $2.00/gallon! I think this is something we should celebrate folks! Just a few months ago it was $4and even $5/gallon in some places. I know I am super pumped about this.
Up until I made my 30 Before 30 List I didn’t really care too much about the price of gas. Sure I would complain about it with everyone else and I thought it was outrageous, but for as long as I have been purchasing gas, I have paid for it with a little piece of plastic that I like to call “The Magic Card”.
The Magic Card is of course a credit card with my name on it, but the bill goes to my mom. I was given the card in high school and I have been responsible enough to keep it in my possession all these years. Back in college there were a lot more things on the list of approved items to be purchased with the Magic Card. Today there remains only one: gas.
I have no idea how I kept gas on the approved list or why. It is just something I was never used to paying. Ironically, the only other thing my mom pays for is my car insurance, so I guess she just really wants me to have a way to get around?
Anyway, the other day I did something I never have done before. I paid for my own gas! It was a conscious decision and I really didn’t want to do it because I love the Magic Card and I didn’t want to put it away forever. We’ve had such a long relationship together. But the time has come. I need to stop pretending my tank just magically stays filled without depleting my bank account.
It feels good. Scary. But good.
Now the only thing I have to do to mark #5 off my list is to take over my car insurance payments in June!
Up until I made my 30 Before 30 List I didn’t really care too much about the price of gas. Sure I would complain about it with everyone else and I thought it was outrageous, but for as long as I have been purchasing gas, I have paid for it with a little piece of plastic that I like to call “The Magic Card”.
The Magic Card is of course a credit card with my name on it, but the bill goes to my mom. I was given the card in high school and I have been responsible enough to keep it in my possession all these years. Back in college there were a lot more things on the list of approved items to be purchased with the Magic Card. Today there remains only one: gas.
I have no idea how I kept gas on the approved list or why. It is just something I was never used to paying. Ironically, the only other thing my mom pays for is my car insurance, so I guess she just really wants me to have a way to get around?
Anyway, the other day I did something I never have done before. I paid for my own gas! It was a conscious decision and I really didn’t want to do it because I love the Magic Card and I didn’t want to put it away forever. We’ve had such a long relationship together. But the time has come. I need to stop pretending my tank just magically stays filled without depleting my bank account.
It feels good. Scary. But good.
Now the only thing I have to do to mark #5 off my list is to take over my car insurance payments in June!
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Terrified of Tithing
I am so scared to post this, but I am willing to bet there are other people who have felt this way too. I have a confession: Tithing scares the crap out of me.
First let me just paint my money picture for you. I am young and low on the totem pole as far as salaries go. But I am much better off than I was when I graduated college 6 years ago (wow…I just realized how long it has taken me to get here…and how long it’s been…I really am getting old). But as you can tell from #5 on my list, I still get help from mom (she pays for my car insurance…and gas). I still practically live paycheck to paycheck. I don’t have Suze Orman’s recommended 3-9 month’s worth of living expenses in savings. In fact I don’t save much at all. I just started contributing a measly 4% to my 401K.
But lately I have felt this pull in my heart on the tithing issue. It is similar to the one I felt on the baptism issue. I was so convinced that my baptism as a baby counted and this church was just trying to force their traditions on me…until I felt this shift in my heart and I heard the truth. It was just that I was embarrassed of getting dunked in a tank of water…which kind of meant that I was embarrassed of God. I was fine sitting in a sea of people singing His praise but I didn’t want to stand up in front of everyone and say it. That pull on my heart was so strong it trumped the embarrassment factor…in fact it almost made me feel silly about it.
I am feeling that same pull now on my heart. I want to give 10% but then I realized how much money that was and now I am scared. That is more than my car payment! More than any other bill I have except my mortgage! And just like that...POOF! I am going to live without that money? What about #5 on my list? I don’t want to keep depending on my mom to help support me financially.
I guess I could cut out something? Like my little mini-vacations…but I might loose my mind if I have no fun. I already cut out a lot. I don’t get pedicures or manicures. I haven’t had my hair cut since July. I rarely buy new clothes or shoes. Cam doesn’t get doggie daycare anymore. I try to save money where I can.
And then there is the whole economy thing. I have never been more scared of loosing my job and not being able to find another one in my life. What would I do?
Do all Christians believe in tithing? I don’t remember my parents tithing. I remember putting money in the offering plate, but it was just on offering, not a tithe. I have heard discussions on how every law in the Bible is not applicable today…that you can’t take the Bible literally. That you should just follow the New Testament and “give generously” but not necessarily 10%. I am trying to do research for myself on what it actually says, but more so I want to listen to my heart, because that is where God speaks to me the most.
I want to trust that God will provide for me, but where is that line between trusting and being personally responsible for myself? I did put my full 10% in the envelope last week, but I don’t know if I can do it again. It’s just so much! Some people have suggested easing into it and giving what I think I can handle right now. But how am I supposed to determine what I can handle? If that were left up to me, I would just give whatever I had left over at the end of the month after all the bills were taken care of and I felt “safe”. And I think that would be missing the point wouldn’t it?
Anyway, I am praying about this issue right now. I hate money. Believe me it is not the “idol” I struggle with. Seriously, I would rather just not think about money at all. I just wanted to put this out there because I know I can’t be the only one who struggles with this.
First let me just paint my money picture for you. I am young and low on the totem pole as far as salaries go. But I am much better off than I was when I graduated college 6 years ago (wow…I just realized how long it has taken me to get here…and how long it’s been…I really am getting old). But as you can tell from #5 on my list, I still get help from mom (she pays for my car insurance…and gas). I still practically live paycheck to paycheck. I don’t have Suze Orman’s recommended 3-9 month’s worth of living expenses in savings. In fact I don’t save much at all. I just started contributing a measly 4% to my 401K.
But lately I have felt this pull in my heart on the tithing issue. It is similar to the one I felt on the baptism issue. I was so convinced that my baptism as a baby counted and this church was just trying to force their traditions on me…until I felt this shift in my heart and I heard the truth. It was just that I was embarrassed of getting dunked in a tank of water…which kind of meant that I was embarrassed of God. I was fine sitting in a sea of people singing His praise but I didn’t want to stand up in front of everyone and say it. That pull on my heart was so strong it trumped the embarrassment factor…in fact it almost made me feel silly about it.
I am feeling that same pull now on my heart. I want to give 10% but then I realized how much money that was and now I am scared. That is more than my car payment! More than any other bill I have except my mortgage! And just like that...POOF! I am going to live without that money? What about #5 on my list? I don’t want to keep depending on my mom to help support me financially.
I guess I could cut out something? Like my little mini-vacations…but I might loose my mind if I have no fun. I already cut out a lot. I don’t get pedicures or manicures. I haven’t had my hair cut since July. I rarely buy new clothes or shoes. Cam doesn’t get doggie daycare anymore. I try to save money where I can.
And then there is the whole economy thing. I have never been more scared of loosing my job and not being able to find another one in my life. What would I do?
Do all Christians believe in tithing? I don’t remember my parents tithing. I remember putting money in the offering plate, but it was just on offering, not a tithe. I have heard discussions on how every law in the Bible is not applicable today…that you can’t take the Bible literally. That you should just follow the New Testament and “give generously” but not necessarily 10%. I am trying to do research for myself on what it actually says, but more so I want to listen to my heart, because that is where God speaks to me the most.
I want to trust that God will provide for me, but where is that line between trusting and being personally responsible for myself? I did put my full 10% in the envelope last week, but I don’t know if I can do it again. It’s just so much! Some people have suggested easing into it and giving what I think I can handle right now. But how am I supposed to determine what I can handle? If that were left up to me, I would just give whatever I had left over at the end of the month after all the bills were taken care of and I felt “safe”. And I think that would be missing the point wouldn’t it?
Anyway, I am praying about this issue right now. I hate money. Believe me it is not the “idol” I struggle with. Seriously, I would rather just not think about money at all. I just wanted to put this out there because I know I can’t be the only one who struggles with this.
Monday, November 17, 2008
Defining Character: Independence
The Defining Character Series continues today with one of my most long-standing qualities- Independence. However... sometimes I’ve got it, sometimes I don’t.In most situations I am very independent. This started from a very young age. In fact when I was just a baby my parents decided to pimp me out for medical testing (we did live in Research Triangle Park). Before you go saying “So, that’s what’s wrong with her…” I will let you know there were no drugs (that I know of) involved. It was more like “how many times do we have to coax this baby to push this button before she starts doing it on her own” type tests. My mom took me to these because when I was something like 6 months old, my dad asked when I was going to get a job. I think this subconsciously told me I better learn how to take care of myself.
My mother also frequently tells me stories of our trip to Disney World when I was like 6. On this trip I figured out how to smuggle in a can of Coke to the park. I wiggled my way to a curbside seat for the parade and left my parents in the back of the crowd. I also attempted to cross 3 or 4 countries at Epcot and told my parents to hold my spot for prime viewing of the fireworks show. (My mom can’t remember if she actually let me go by myself.)
Now that I am all grown up I own my own house and manage to take care of it. Although there have been some crazy adventures with that one. I take care of my own car (to the best of my ability). Basically if anything goes wrong in my life, I have to figure out how to fix it. I can’t go calling daddy to come fix it. I manage to figure a way most of the time. Sure there are things that probably need fixing, but aren’t essential so I ignore them for a while. And of course I get advice and help from friends occasionally. And my mom has bailed me out on a rare occasion...but overall I am pretty darn capable of taking care of myself.
Lately though I have recognized a few areas where my independence needs some work:
1. Unknown social situations: Basically I need someone I know to be at any new activities I do. I have a hard time going to something new without have a friend go through it with me. For example, I really want to go to my church’s “Young Professionals” events (to meet a boy mainly…I know that is so, so bad). But I have no one to go with me and the thought of going alone makes me want to curl up in a little ball under a rock and hide. But maybe I need to challenge myself. I mean if I were truly independent would I think twice about going by myself?
2. You already know this one because it is on the list- Paying my Own Bills: There are 2 bills my mom still pays- my gas and my car insurance. Mainly because my car insurance bill came the month I graduated college and when she tried to hand it over to me, I convinced her I couldn’t pay it and needed to focus on finding a job. The gas thing is because that was the one allowable item I could charge to my parent’s credit card back when I first got it 10 years ago and I just never stopped. I have set a goal of taking these over at the beginning of the new year (or whenever it is time to renew my car insurance). But I really do need to budget a little better because I am practically living paycheck-to-paycheck as it is.
But I am not one of those crazy people who won’t let anyone else take care of them. Who doesn’t like to be taken care of every now and then? But I do like knowing that I am capable of doing it on my own. Because when it comes down to it who do you have to depend on but yourself?
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
30 Before 30 List Updates
Here’s an update on my “30 Before 30” list progress (or lack thereof) lately:
Get in the best shape of my life/5K training- I have taken 2 weeks off my trainging due to my hectic schedule and the blisters on the back of my feet. I am regretting it now because I can’t seem to get back into the swing of things. Last night I changed into my workout gear right after work and do you know what happened? I fell asleep on the couch. Until 9:00! Only 7 more weeks until the race! So I better get on it! If you haven’t signed up yet, go join our team now:
Jingle Joggers ROCK!
If you can’t be there, contribute to my fundraising efforts by clicking here
I have also started a diet. Diets are so hard, but I have to do something. I am not comfortable in my own skin. My clothes are too tight which causes me to dress frumpily. I don’t want to be a frump. I want to be cute! So don’t tempt me with anything I shouldn’t be eating, k?
Get a job I love- Well, you guys weren’t much help with my poll. Only 3 people voted- one for Marketing Superstar, one for Graphic Designer, and one for Store Owner. I have no freaking clue. I guess all I can do for now is to go with the flow since I have to pay my bills. I did sign up for an MBA Boot Camp course through my employer that I will be taking Nov. 3-7. Maybe that will give me some insight!
Pay all my own bills- I have made a decision. When my lease runs out on my beetle-bug in April I will not be getting a new car. This makes me oh so sad. I was looking forward to heated seats and an extended warranty, but for now I have to stick with old faithful. I am going to drive the 4Runner for a while. It is over 10 years old and I am afraid of it dying in the middle of the road, but it is what I need to do. I need to save more money and this will be a good way of doing that. I am going to take over my car insurance payments from my mom at that time and hopefully my gas expenses too so I can check this one off the list!
Grow a plant- I still have not gotten any tulip bulbs. Heck, I still haven’t put my laundry away or vacuumed in like a month, so first things first people! My light fixture in my kitchen has not been replaced. It is just the ugly fluorescent bulbs for now with no cover. At least I never have anyone come visit to witness this disaster that is my house. (its not that bad really, just needs a little work!)
Read the Bible all the way through- I told you earlier about an email service I signed up for that would email me some chapters each day and within a year Viola'!- I would have read the whole thing. Well, that didn’t work out as well as I was hoping. They had technical difficulties and I wasn’t getting the emails everyday like I should. So I am going to old fashion route.
I bought a new Bible- isn’t it pretty? It's pink...and brown but so cute!
And I bought a reading guide/journal to help me:
The rest of the stuff is on hold for now.
Get in the best shape of my life/5K training- I have taken 2 weeks off my trainging due to my hectic schedule and the blisters on the back of my feet. I am regretting it now because I can’t seem to get back into the swing of things. Last night I changed into my workout gear right after work and do you know what happened? I fell asleep on the couch. Until 9:00! Only 7 more weeks until the race! So I better get on it! If you haven’t signed up yet, go join our team now:
Jingle Joggers ROCK!
If you can’t be there, contribute to my fundraising efforts by clicking here
I have also started a diet. Diets are so hard, but I have to do something. I am not comfortable in my own skin. My clothes are too tight which causes me to dress frumpily. I don’t want to be a frump. I want to be cute! So don’t tempt me with anything I shouldn’t be eating, k?
Get a job I love- Well, you guys weren’t much help with my poll. Only 3 people voted- one for Marketing Superstar, one for Graphic Designer, and one for Store Owner. I have no freaking clue. I guess all I can do for now is to go with the flow since I have to pay my bills. I did sign up for an MBA Boot Camp course through my employer that I will be taking Nov. 3-7. Maybe that will give me some insight!
Pay all my own bills- I have made a decision. When my lease runs out on my beetle-bug in April I will not be getting a new car. This makes me oh so sad. I was looking forward to heated seats and an extended warranty, but for now I have to stick with old faithful. I am going to drive the 4Runner for a while. It is over 10 years old and I am afraid of it dying in the middle of the road, but it is what I need to do. I need to save more money and this will be a good way of doing that. I am going to take over my car insurance payments from my mom at that time and hopefully my gas expenses too so I can check this one off the list!
Grow a plant- I still have not gotten any tulip bulbs. Heck, I still haven’t put my laundry away or vacuumed in like a month, so first things first people! My light fixture in my kitchen has not been replaced. It is just the ugly fluorescent bulbs for now with no cover. At least I never have anyone come visit to witness this disaster that is my house. (its not that bad really, just needs a little work!)
Read the Bible all the way through- I told you earlier about an email service I signed up for that would email me some chapters each day and within a year Viola'!- I would have read the whole thing. Well, that didn’t work out as well as I was hoping. They had technical difficulties and I wasn’t getting the emails everyday like I should. So I am going to old fashion route.
I bought a new Bible- isn’t it pretty? It's pink...and brown but so cute!
And I bought a reading guide/journal to help me:
The rest of the stuff is on hold for now.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Update on The List
I feel like it is taking FOREVER to cross the next thing off my list! (I’ve already told y’all I’m not patient at all!) I am also getting a little nervous because 2 years seemed like a long time when I made the list, but time goes by more quickly than you expect. And if I don’t get everything crossed off I am going to feel like a complete LOSER, so the pressure is really on. It would really help if I could find a money tree somewhere around here. I didn’t realize so many of these things are going to require a good chunk of change!
Anyway, here is an update on The List progress:
Anyway, here is an update on The List progress:
- Get in the best shape of my life- the 5K training is helping with this a little, but I need to step it up! Maybe I’ll get a trainer? They really do help!
- Try snowboarding – trying to get a ski trip planned for Feb. I guess I’ll be renting a board instead of skis!
- Get a job I love – Still no word here. I am thinking about going back to school.
- Take Cam to an agility class- no time or funds right now. But he did learn to “bow” recently (it’s so cute!)
- Pay all my own bills (with no help from mom)- I plan on taking over my car insurance when I get a new car next year. (My lease runs out in April.) I’ll have to learn to budget better in order to take over the gas though, and hopefully prices will go down a little.
- Ask out a crush- This would require an adequate crush. There are none at this point in time. Sad…I know!
- Run a 5K- I might have to take a week off from training because I have the worst blisters on the back of my heels! Or maybe I could run in flip-flops?
- Go to a water park and not feel self-conscious- luckily I don’t have to worry about this until at least next summer!
- Kayak- too cold to kayak now, but I think a camping/kayaking trip in the mountains sounds fabulous!
- Catch a fish- This can wait until summer
- Open my heart to someone- Yeah, that would require a guy. (see #6)
- Make a baby laugh- My friend in ATL is having a baby in Feb. Maybe I will get a chance to go out there to meet the little munchkin, act stupid and get a laugh out of him!
- Change a diaper (no I have never done this) - I don’t want to think about this. But whatever baby laughs at me, I guess the least I can do to thank them is change their diaper!
- Go on a mission trip- I found out about a mission trip to South Africa in December, but I looked it up on the website today and it costs $2500! That took the wind out of my sails!
- Help a stranger- no strangers that need help have crossed my path yet
- Find a doctor I trust- haven’t had time to investigate this yet, plus I have been pretty healthy, so there hasn’t been any motivation to do so.
- Grow a plant- I’m going to wait until growing season for this (someone please let me know when “growing season” is!)
- Upgrade one room in my house- My light fixture in my kitchen broke. I had already been thinking this would be the room I would re-do. So I guess I’ll do it one thing at a time. I’ll post some pics when I finally get a new light fixture!
- Travel abroad- yeah money is an issue with this one. I might have to count Mexico as “abroad”!
Swim with a dolphin- Go skinny dipping- No…no desire to do this right now
- Visit Washington, DC – I am trying to see if I can pull together a trip this spring to see the Cherry Blossoms.
- Take a dance lesson- I did have a dance lesson from a 7 year old last week…does that count?
Sing Karaoke- Invest in the stock market- umm…have you seen the news? I don’t want to get on that roller coaster ride!
- Kiss in the rain- Need I remind you? …THERE IS NO GUY in the picture right now. If I kiss my dog in the rain could that count? (Yet another reminder of how pathetic I am!)
- Read the Bible all the way through- I signed up for this “Bible in a Year” email service. It emails you a selection each day and in a year you will have read the whole Bible! I also joined a Bible study group. We actually have to memorize a new verse each week. It takes me back to Bible School days!
- Go see a movie at the theater- alone!- Nothing that I am dying to see right now
- Attempt Surfing- Again…waiting for summer…too cold for the ocean right now!
Purchase 1 piece of expensive jewelry for myself- By the way, the other night I thought I lost one of my earrings and FREAKED out! It was just the icing on a bad day that I didn’t need! Luckily I found it in between the sheets on my bed. Note to self: Do not wear expensive earrings to bed anymore.
Oh and I finally finished my latest book! Check out my review of The Friday Night Knitting Club on my Bookshelf Blog!
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Greed and Capitalism
I’m sure you all have read the headlines about the government bailing out AIG to the tune of $85 billion. What in the heck is going on? First the housing market crumbles. Investment firm Bear Sterns gets nearly $30 billion to avert a major financial default. Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac got help with the government investing as much as $200 billion in preferred stock and at least $5 billion in mortgage securities. Then the stock market takes a nose dive. Lehman Brothers is no more. Morgan Stanley gets sold to Bank of America. Gas and Food prices are through the roof and unemployment is at a high. I am having second thoughts about #25 on my list: Invest in the stock market.The rule of thumb for defining a recession is when the GDP (Gross Domestic Product) growth is negative for two or more consecutive quarters. What is the GDP? It is a measure of the output of goods and services produced by labor and property located in the United States. So far this hasn’t happened, but I think we are all feeling the pain of this economic slump. So does that mean it is about to get worse? I’m no financial guru, but it doesn’t look good.
But you know what? It’s all relative. I may have to cut corners and buy generic rather than brand name while someone else may not be able to pay their bills at all. Then you have the elite who might not be able to splurge on every $5,000 handbag they see or have to sell one of their 15 cars. It’s a complex issue and I know life isn’t fair, but it seems like something is wrong here.
I am all for having to get a job and working hard for what you have. I hate government handouts. It breeds laziness and corruption of a system that was meant to help out, not be your sole income. GO GET A FREAKING JOB PEOPLE. If it came down to it, I would work at Target and love it probably. I would even work at McDonald’s if I had to. I would find something to make some money. I know there are probably times when people do need help. If something devastating happened to me, I would hope my family and friends would help, but what if you don’t have that? And when does it turn from “helping” to “taking advantage of? (This is one of the reasons why I want to be able to pay all of my own bills by the end of the year-#5 on my list!)
I do think people who work hard and smart should be able to enjoy the benefits of that. Everyone wants to feel financially secure and afford whatever they want without thinking about it. But when does ambition and success turn into greed?
I think there is something wrong with the super rich. Those people who make millions and millions each year. They have financial advisers who can find every tax loophole in the book. They hide their money in off-shore accounts. They keep getting richer and richer while the middle class slide back further and further. I have no idea what the solution is, but it isn’t a hand out. These CEOs and shareholders make tons of money (while sharing as little as possible- damn working for the man!), then they make some bad decisions and the federal government comes to the rescue. What kind of example does this set for everyone else? Oh, don’t worry, if you mess up the government will come save you. Take some responsibility people! How can the government afford all these bail-outs AND the war AND welfare AND social security AND food stamps? Something has to change. I’m anxiously awaiting the presidential candidate’s debates to see how they would address these issues. What are your thoughts?
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